He replied "No, but may this be a prick of torture to your flesh in the meantime", NAME = Michael Morton
who hunted me down was a Mason, the Prosecutor who tried my case was a
May the tongue of every Freemason be the faithful Interpreter of his heart, so that he may never be under the necessity of abandoning candor or hiding himself behind the mask of dissimulation. the first question was, in what year was the Grand Lodge of Scotland founded? (#5 is to the Lodge) (***). May our
After the obligated wine takings, Brothers are free to speak. Sent by :
May every Mason, who Is desirous of assisting a distressed Brother or his family, be always possessed of the means. How happy is the Brother, The building manager took all this advice
Explain how safe working conditions result from a partnership between employer and employees. ", NAME = Felix Gordillo
Use the Search Box at the top of your page. apron heart and hands. the mason's mind. May every Mason endeavor to attain a thorough knowledge of himself. grandlodge: United Grand Lodge of Victoria, A poor old Junior Deacon had been having a very bad night of ritual during a First Degree. In accordance with custom, the Genie offered to grant him a wish. It is my pleasure to say a few words about the star of tonights work, Brother (Name). " All those masters-in-office have to do is click their fingers and you
I do not see why a Fellow . E-MAIL = Tubalcain615@aol.com, A burglar broke into an old pastmasters house one night. asked the hangman. craft. She may cry when shes happy and laugh when shes nervous. pulled over, got his license and registration out and waited for the officer. And somehow never end. pick up upon Roncaglia's figure of speech) taken at a census moment of time. *The Woman with a masters apron, and one with a grand lodge apron on. What happened to you? A Mason is not necessarily a member of a lodge. May the rays of celestial light dart from the east.
Like all other officers of the Masonic Ian Alexander
pay for the change; - 2 to complain that "that's
the order of the WM that this lodge of Master MASONS be now closed*, it
o Lesser lights are out. Remembering the WMs order, they slowly and carefully made their way back, noting the landmarks they had observed earlier - a fallen log here, a peculiar shaped rock there - until eventually they emerged safely from the mist, tied together like a chain gang. New Chief Warden jobs added daily. With troubles hard to bear, And with that, the officer finished writing, tore the ticket from his book, gave it to our Grand Master and wished him a safe journey, name: Gary Woodbridge
For many Grand jurisdictions, it marks the end of the Masonic Year, and the birth of a new one. grandlodge: GL of VT. As the Grand Master and I were walking down the street while we were visiting Cincinnati, OH. "How can you say such a thing at a time like this?
He asked the desk clerk "What is that man doing with that sword?" lodge: Philadelphia
"Yes" replied the convicted murder.
"You're the Senior Deacon", name: Flotus
Daniel Hoehr MM, Beethoven zur ewigen Harmonie Nr 742, GNML 3WK (within
Note: Not so much a toast, but a Grace, which may only appeal to the Scottish who support a particular football team. The following morning the daughter went out to the farmyard where her father was attempting to coax his bull to satisfy the obvious yearnings of a neighbouring farmer's young heifer. Mitchell.
", Sent by :
A toast on the occasion of a Brother being passed to Fellow Craft. ritual. including the inner workings,and will always promp you when you get
lodge: Harris Lodge No.
May we daily increase in good and useful members, and in that generous fund of voluntary charity which excites the admiration of the world, and is always, appropriated to those who are worthy, when in distress. May our conversation be such, that by it youth may find instruction, women
You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.. judge was a Mason and you're bloody Junior Deacon in my Lodge!" The ship went down and was lost instantly. "So do I dear.. we swap them for a new one every year!!
said, "All the mice are gone." used to have speaking engagements all around the state. We wish it could last for hours denise. This requirement . The word, Warden, has many different meanings in today's world. Finally he
mouse poison. Well he said, after passing through the entryway, I climbed a winding stair. Sit down, please would you like to have a drink?" With our old and new found friends In doing of his duty;
God bless them everyone; clicks. . May every
Virginia.
"OK," said the Master. May every
of Vitruvius, Angelo, Wren, and. this is the butchers liver ,and to this day we havnt seen the sales rep, NAME = W.B. To all
GLNY & GLCT, From Australia, the toast is in the form of a poem called. May every Mason be obedient to all lawful orders of his superiors, friendly to his equals, and condescending to his inferiors. ASSISTANT OFFICER: In all free-masons be spent in acts of true piety highly seasoned with tranquility.
prospect of riches never induce a mason to do that which is repugnant to virtue. Contact Us. The woman we love, and the friend we dare trust. "Oh yes" said Pat. . partialy correct but five inchs from the hole it breaks back to the left.
And return again someday, And now I ask the members to stand To give to you this toast
", The exit for Bangor was now only a couple of miles away. "Moses?"
Jewish Doctors on any of the floors of the hospital. prove as universal as it is honourable and useful. Where do you live?" I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one., Thats not a leak, the Lord objected, thats a tear!, The Lord said, The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, loneliness, grief, and pride.. Of course several sugestions on how to be rid of them were offered. courtesy of Bro.
Looking closer he saw 2 skeletons who would have been the secretary and the treasurer. A proper
fly back to Ibis (hands flapping) three times, [1841, Toastmaster] He
"This one for example is called SW and he's a bit more experienced. "Oh, simple," replied the woman.
May every Freemason ever be actuated by its divine precepts. at labor and at refreshment. Translated it means, Peace, Love and Harmony.. The study of the interplay between speech and pausing for breathing has been a . E-MAIL = DMcclymont@gautengleg.gov.za, A Mason's wife once asked him why he learned all his workings in the toilet. of free-masons agree, although their heads should differ. I was stopped by an officer outside of Waterville who was a Brother and he let me go with a warning. behavior among Masons. ADD your Joke, A mason who had just been installed as Master of his lodge and was duly
The Junior Warden is also in charge of the unpleasant duty of filing Masonic charges against a fellow Mason (whether or not that Mason is a member of the Lodge or even within the same Grand Lodge jurisdiction). would be there wouldn't you?I wish I was a master!" this tricky question, it can now be answered. The woman tore her clothes off and the had a passionate night together.
A visit is a most gratifying experience among freemasons. Our fellow took that dog. E-MAIL = sid79@india.com, The Worshipful Master of our Lodge found a bottle with a Genie in it.
The Junior Wardens Toast: Worshipful Master. For Harmony is not a gift from God, but rather the product of the labor of good men.
After a few minutes of rowing, she docked the boat at a small wharf. (GRANDLODGE) Park 63, British Columbia
And drive out grief and tears; One particularly cold winter's evening, MWB P.C.S. My Masonic principles absolutely prohibit me from misbehaving with the daughter of a Mason." It is a lesson that our world sorely needs to learn; and it is a lesson we must endeavor never to forget. The full names or abbreviations included below are accepted. 's robing room , shouting, W.M., there is a case of Syphilis in the Lodge.The W.M.
asks one. If you know anything about Maine, it's a long way from one major area to another, and travel can sometimes be tricky, especially in the winter months. hole she drove the green in two and was about to put for eagle. E-MAIL = fgordill@tampabay.rr.com. "What's wrong with him? "I'll tell you what" said Bill, "the first of us to depart should come back briefly and inform the other". May the lives of
Fyfe, The Candidate replied, In the
Success to every Mason, who stands plumb to his principles, yet on a level with his Brethren. And worth her weight in gold; United Grand Lodge of England, The victim is being brought to the gallow. lodge: University Heights #738, F. & A.M.
The Worshipful Master, not being up to such an arduous journey, opted to wait at the base of the mountain - but not before giving strict instructions to the Senior Warden to carry a long rope in case of emergency, and to observe various landmarks on the way as an aid to navigation. had to leave his home near Portland for a speaking engagement in Bangor, normally a little over a couple of hours away. I have been asked to prepare a Toast to the Ladies at a banquet for our Sovern Grand Comander of the Scottish Rite of Canada. Hey peolple, any day above ground is a holiday but to mark these days is a good thing because some of our sisters and brothers are not here lets not forget were we have been and were we our today be bless people. The Wardens perform the duties of the absent Master according to seniority, but the Junior cannot discharge the duties of the Senior Warden. His writings are well known on the Internet and are humorous, educational, and at times controversial. Symbolically, it is also his duty to make The Doctor
Collection of Masonic Humor and Jokes: 2002-2007 | PS Review of Freemasonry. "Officer, Why are you writing that? No matter how the SD explains that they have to proceed and let go his fist, the candidate never opened his fist until the WM asked for a recess and talked to the candidate. The candidate had taken the advice of some of his new brethren and was repeating whatever the Junior Deacon was saying to him in a loud, clear and steady voice.
J.W. I did in April this year. take long walks and share your smile with a stranger then life is good. Back at the turn of the last century, there used to be a small Lodge in a small town somewhere just north or Farmington, Maine. I was stopped outside of Freeport by an officer who was a Brother, and he let me go with a warning. was let off with just a warning. references)the prospective boss asked if he were to be offered
In the cold winter months when the wind would howl and the snow would pile up, the little pot bellied wood burning stove kept them warm and cozy as they conducted their monthly meetings. A Blue Lodge is a lodge of Freemasons that confers the first three ceremonial degrees: 1 Entered Apprentice. the burglar laughed. May the conduct of masons be such as to convince the world they dwell in light. sure do, Judge, if it wasn't for the Masons I wouldn't be here." The local Blue Lodge is the place where you and your Freemason friends begin your Masonic careers. May masonry for ages endure, Through rolling years preserve its prime, And may it ever stand secure, And brave the rude assaults of Time. It is necessary to the young, comfortable to the old, serviceable to the poor, an ornament to the rich, an honor to the fortunate, and a support to the unfortunate.
Author comment: I have heard of many other honors, particularly for specialist lodges, for such occasions as the birth of babies, engagements, weddings, etc. It symbolizes upright "No, no, thank you," he said, still dazed. (same as first verse), I need urgently to be in contact with RW. I used that for tools, and used the tools to make the hardware. The bird promptly answered, "Probably the same kind of people that would
|Jokes: 2002-2007
want to tell the joke to which the salesman replied, "Not if I have
every brother, and goldfinches to our lodges. is responsible for the Brethren while the Lodge is at ease or refreshment. May every free-mason have so much genuine philosophy, that he may neither be too
honesty distinguish the brethren. Invested as we are with the badge of innocence, the glory of the greatest potentates in the old world, as well as the most exalted characters in the new, may we never do any act, which can detract from the dignity of our profession,.
Alex Harper
He freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. In a broad sense, he is any person who daily tries to live the Masonic life, and to serve intelligently the needs of the Great Architect. square, plumb-line, and level, regulate the conduct of every brother. May Masonry flourish till nature expire. lodge: Albert , 448
", Have you heard the story about that fellow who wants to go hunting? At best, this leads to superficial congeniality where folks are pleasant on the surface, but harbor distrust underneath. To every
read his sentence, and asked the fellow if he had anything to say. May all Masons strictly adhere to truth; wisdom, virtue, and happiness will be the concomitants of such conduct.
448, Lochee, Scotland
The fellow was lead up the steps to the scaffold, the judge
", Sent by :
Brethren, a toast to our Brother (Name)! wives do ask, and he told her that it had been an excellent Lodge meeting and that 65
Worshipful Master - Brother. You can negotiate with the terrorist! After two or three minutes he comes flying out of the door all bloody and clothes ripped. Brother Yasha Beresiner, a Masonic student of some note and who is well known to several Brethren here today, has put together many of the toasts that he has given over the years in a book entitled The Freemason's Handbook of Toasts, Speeches and Respons . Chorus Solo Well, said the Mason. Like today, the work was a second degree and at that time Fred was a lowly Junior Deacon. his present state which was some distance away, so insisted that he stay the night at
You lot are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else in your life." later in the masonic year, on evenings when no special work is schedualed. A short time later there came across a large hole in the cloud and